Is this suspicious or am I crazy?

Question

My husband never lets me use his phone.... well tonight while he was sleeping I went through it. He does text a girl from work all the time but he deleted the messages and he’s sworn to me it’s just about work. I know her and I consider us friends. Well anyways I go through his notes (he types out things in notes sometimes when he’s mad and trying to figure the best way to word it) I find a message from A few months ago that’s says “it really bothered me that you thought I paid for dinner for something in return” Well seems weird so I start my digging. I go on my phone and I look up that date and the date before and BAM we went to dinner with this girl(who he swears is just a co worker and friend) and he payed. I’m going to confront him tomorrow

Answer

Sounds like she may have felt that way and he cares about her enough to let her know that wasn’t the case. If he’s deleting messages I wouldn’t know how to take that though honestly.

Answer

There’s red flags all over the place here. 
Firstly, your partner shouldn’t hide or be secretive with their phone. 
Secondly, you shouldn’t have so much distrust that you have to go snooping through their possessions. 
Thirdly, he’s deleting messages. That’s only “normal” behaviour if he does it with everyone (e.g. to save space on his phone) and not with one or a select few people. 
That note in his phone seems weird. It could be innocent on his part, but then again if she feels more than friendship towards him then he should be setting boundaries with her and not entertaining her at all.

Answer

That’s definitely a little weird, but if you’re going through his phone that’s already a red flag in your relationship.

Answer

If my husband didn’t let me “use” his phone that would tell me all I need to know🤷🏻‍♀️ I never go through my husbands and phone ever. But if I asked him to he would absolutely hand it right over. I wouldn’t have to sneak while he’s sleeping.

Answer

I’d trust my intuition on this one. And don’t think every woman is your friend. Often times it’s “friends” who end up being the other woman.

Answer

It seems like he could be pursuing her and she’s not interested. Him being secretive about his phone is worrying on top of the deleted messages. I’d keep an eye on that.

Answer

Y’all both went to dinner with her??! What the fuckk??? That’s so odddd!! Why would she assume he wanting something from her when you were with them?

Answer

He’s saying he’s bothered that she expected something though? Are you mad at him? Cause it seems like it should be her that the issue is with. Even though this was months ago.... the weirdest thing to me is that their conversations are deleted, that seems suspicious

Answer

What else is there besides 'not being allowed' to use his phone? There must be something? Cause just going through his phone  and you went through a lot if you even went through his notes, cause he doesn't want you to is cray cray.
You basically read his diary... an absolute no go.

Answer

Yeah that's odd

Is this suspicious or am I crazy?

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