still hurts

so it’s been like four months since my ex broke up with me and i still think about him and maybe even cry a little and idk why it’s taking me so long to get over him he hates me and i feel like that’s the worst part that’s delaying my healing process i’m just so sick of being hung up on this guy when we first broke up i wrote all the pros and cons of him and the cons we’re WAYYYYY longer than the pros so it’s like i realize how much of a piece of shit he is why do i still miss him and how fucking long is it going to take until i can go just one day without thinking abt him it kills me everytime i think abt him i swear to god i mean it’s gotten better recently i was a wreck before crying at work, random outbursts of crying when love songs came on just crying every day and every night until i slept and thank god it’s not as bad anymore but it hurts still and i don’t know why

TLTR: why am i still hung up on my bum of an ex?