Bf with ED

I'm not a doctor but I'm sure that's his case seeing as he can't stay erect for longer than two minutes even if I "wake the dead" as he calls it.... nada but sex is not that important to me. The intimacy is what I crave more than anything. We been together 4 years and he don't know that. This really bothers him so I encourage him to see a doctor he thinks that will make him less than a man, I read ED could be a mental thing. He has alot of unresolved childhood trauma I encouraged him to see a therapist again less than a man so I eventually gave up I figured if he wanted help he'll get it I don't want him to feel like I'm nagging. I've been seeing a therapist for grief counseling, I lost my brother a few years ago and childhood trauma which has really helped me alot. I have more happy days now, he notices that then deduces that I'm seeing someone else. I plead with him that I'm not and he starts beating himself up about not being able to keep an erection. I reiterate seeing a doctor and/or counseling still not trying to hear it. I'm really starting to feel like this is a sinking boat like why can't he see the love that's right in front of him