TW Idk what to call this?

Anna

I’m sure everyone went through the “exploration” phase as kids. But recently I’ve been reliving a specific time, and idk what to call it. I was about 7 (i don’t really remember the age, but I was young), and I loved to hang out with my older cousin. She’s around 4 years older. She would tell me that we’ll play games, and she would be a boy and I’m the girl. It all seemed innocent for me at first, since I didn’t know about anything. But then she told me to kiss her neck and she would kiss mine too. And then she’d get a bit naked and made me “explore” her body in a way. She’s then tell me to get naked as well. Idk if I’m explaining this well, but I don’t really want to be thinking about it. I feel like she used me in a way. And I feel like I lost my innocence. So I guess what I’m asking is, was this abuse? Could someone try to explain what this could’ve been, please? And I’m sorry for not going into detail. I really don’t remember too much. All I know is that we played “games” and it included us getting naked…