I'm depressed and don't know what to do.

I know I had post-partum depression 2 years ago when we had our 2nd baby. But I never said anything. I've since talked to my husband about it. But now I just know it in my bones that I'm still very depressed. I'm literally not happy at all. I feel so empty inside. I'm literally just living life to take care of my boys and that's it. It's hurting my marriage because I'm just faking to be happy and to love my husband at this point. I'm faking being a happy mom. Don't get me wrong I love my boys to death. It's just I'm a sahm. I get burnt out. I never get breaks. My husband never thinks about my mental health. He also expects us to do everything together. At this point I need help.

I can't keep going on living like I'm miserable. But I have no health insurance so I can't even get medicated for it. I refuse to go to counseling and couldn't even afford it or get the time away for it. And I've been before when I was younger and just hated it. So yeah.