Is 6 months dating too early to discuss shared life goals e.g. kids, marriage etc?

Question

Is 6 months dating too early to tell my boyfriend that I want a family one day and with that information does he see a future with me?
When I bring things up, my boyfriend says that we shouldn’t worry about things now and it’s all about having fun now and think about these things later. Naturally this makes me anxious because I want to know we have similar life plans otherwise that’s a dealbreaker for me

Answer

I don’t think it’s too early. I told my fiancé the first day we hung out that I will never want kids. He was shocked he found someone like him and now we are engaged.
There’s no point in wasting your time with someone who doesn’t want the same thing as you.

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If he's not willing to have a conversation about it, half a year into your relationship that would be a red flag to me lol. Bring it up again and bring up how you feel and if he says he doesn't want to have that conversation then it's time to move on

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There’s nothing wrong with making sure you’re on the same page. You’re not asking him for kids asap - just making him aware you want them someday and does he, eventually, want them someday too? You should be able to have these conversations and if he’s unwilling to even do that I’d be concerned. You don’t want to waste your time with someone who doesn’t want what you do out of life.

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Lol I disscuss that stuff on date 2😂 it’s important to have the same goals snd foundations, or else your just wasting your time

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I think it depends how old you are and what stage of life you’re in. In college at 21 years old, no one I dated wanted to have that conversation because it’s not where they were in life. At 25 when I started to date my husband, we talked about it fairly early because we were at the point in life that we dating had a long term goal and wasn’t just for fun.

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I don’t think it’s too early to discuss that at all, I would’ve discussed it in the very beginning because if he doesn’t want kids or he doesn’t want to get married, you’re basically wasting your time if that is something that you want. Now if you’re saying you want it to happen now, or are you sabotage things like poking holes in condoms, that kind of thing that is not acceptable.  I would’ve discussed it on the first few dates to make sure you’re both looking for the same thing. I would want to know if they’re looking for a relationship, if they’re looking for marriage, kids, what their goals are in life and the goals of the relationship. If he’s looking for a hook up or friends with benefits, and you’re looking for a relationship, obviously you’re going to have an issue. I would’ve discuss those things within the first month. And I wouldn’t of wasted my time especially if your goals don’t align. I think maybe he feels you’re pressuring him, or that’s why he says it’s way too quick to be discussing those things, but if he feels like you want them now maybe that’s why He is feeling pressured and having an awkward conversation. I would say to him look I’m not asking for them now, I just want to know if we both have the same goals in the relationship, if not then I won’t waste my time. XYNZ is important to me, and I want to make sure that we are both on the same page before we go  any further.￼ I would’ve talked about family, relationships with your parents, what his childhood was like, I would’ve done all of that in the very beginning. I wanna know somebody’s mental health, I want to know what things are like when they are angry or stressed out if they’ll take it out on me, are they jealous, possessive, controlling, I want to know everything before I say yes. This is why you’re going to take the time to get to know somebody, I’m sorry if some men find it offensive, but I grill men. I don’t waste my time I’m too damn old to be doing that. I don’t date potential, I want a man who has his life established, not a guy who struggling and can’t keep jobs, I’ve i’ve done the fixer-upper before, and all I did was fix them up for the next person, I do not date potential, I date somebody who has their life together. Somebody who lives on their own, somebody who can clean up after themselves, somebody who isn’t expecting me to be his maid or get tired of asking him to do some thing or if he lives in his mothers basement and plays video games all day, absolutely not. And it’s not a controlling thing, it’s not insecurities blah blah blah, I want to know exactly what I am dealing with. I am 43, I am not messing with guys who live in their moms basement and play video games, my current Partner is a lawyer, we talked about it in the very beginning that kids were off the table, I said absolutely I totally agree, I am 43, I do not want children, but I don’t mind someone who comes with kids, his kids are in their 20s, he’s an empty Nester, I couldn’t be happier. I have no desire to get married anytime soon, and he knows that we are enjoying ourselves thoroughly. We just take it one day at a time and enjoy ourselves no pressure, we are best friends, I’ve known him 20 years even before we got together a year and a half ago. Maybe he doesn’t have the same goals that you do and that’s why he’s brushing it off. Sometimes guys tell you what you wanna hear but have no intention of ever doing so, I have a cousin who’s dated a woman over 10 years, I think he’s stringing her along and cheese hoping and waiting for marriage and he has no desire to ever get married again after being sheltered with divorce. Maybe they have an arrangement I have no clue. But he never wants to marry her and he’s made that clear to all of us. I would say to him look I don’t wanna waste my time, and I don’t wanna waste your time, I just wanna make sure that we both want the same things. I’m not saying I want it now, I’m not asking you for a timeline, but I just wanna know if we want the same things or not. I’m not gonna do anything to try and pressure you, I just want to know if we both want the same things or not. I want to buy a house, I want to finish college, I want to get married, I wanna have three children, I want my family nearby, I want to travel, whatever you want you need to talk about I want to Live in the state, I want to whatever your list of demands is, or whatever you want. You need to make it known because if you want to go to law school in another state, or medical school or whatever it may be, and he’s not having it or being supportive then you already know and not to have deadweight to drag you down. You have your goals, you have your dreams, and if they don’t align, don’t waste your time￼￼￼￼

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No it's not too early to have that conversation. You want to make sure you want the same things in life and talk about them. If he can't even talk about any of that then that's an issue. It's not like you're asking to get married and have babies right now

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No! In my experience when a man is serious and sees a future with you he will tell you and discuss these things even without you mentioning. This, considering you’re not in high school. My boyfriend started bringing these things up two months into the relationship saying he sees himself Marrying me and having kids with me. Even in my previous when I brought it up he wouldn’t be opposed to talking about it.

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I told my now husband in high school one day I wanted to have kids for sure and lots of dogs and land and build a dream home. 
Here I am 12 years later with 2 kids trying for another and 3 dogs. Contemplating another. Looking at land and have a barndo plan picked out. 😅
He’s hitting all my high school goals lol

Answer

Yeah I think it makes sense to communicate general life goals & what you ultimately want from relationships. 
Perhaps he isn't serious about the future right now & is just dating for fun. One certainly can't assume that everyone who dates does so for a specific type of future. Some people date just because you are fun and they like you.

Is 6 months dating too early to discuss shared life goals e.g. kids, marriage etc?

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