Confused and scared to test !!

Ill start by saying I have PCOS and very irregular cycles. sometimes I skip periods for months on end and only get them when on bc. I decided to stop the bc in 2020 as I was just exhausted form using them and ready to start actively trying for baby again. My ob put me on clomid which I took along with progesterone for 2 cycles. I had what I was told were chemical pregnancies both cycles. I didnt do the 3rd cycle because I was busy planning my wedding and wanted to avoid all the side effects during that time and for my honeymoon. Oddly enough I stopped the clomid in august and had 3 natural cycles back to back from September to November. Now its January and my period is 29 days late based on glow and I have so many symptoms breast are super sore, backpains, a vibrating/fluttering feeling in my stomach when I'm laying down,nausea, headaches, dizzy spells here and there and food aversions,but I cant bring myself to test and risk seeing another negative. I tested once at the start of January it was negative and haven't tested since. I'm not sure what I'm looking for maybe a word of encouragement or hope that it's still possible to get a positive.