Is it disrespectful for my husband to go out partying and not come home at night? It’s 7am and he’s still not home

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Had you discussed his plans? Like if you’re too drunk, please don’t drive and stay where you are? Or is this lack of communication all together?

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His plan was to go to a bar and then come home. The bar closed at 2am so I was expecting him by 2:30am at the latest. I had no idea where he was after the bar. He confirmed that he was at a friend’s house and did cocaine, which he knows is a deal breaker for me…

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Well everyone else comments are generous, if my partner went out partying all night and didn’t come home I’d be fuming not knowing! to go home after drinking doesn’t mean you have to drink drive, get a lift, walk, pay for a taxi! There’s generally no other excuse to not come home other then if it was already planned and you knew, he passed out or he’s been with another women!

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I would hope he wouldn’t drive home drunk.

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He’s very disrespectful. You said you expected him home at 2:30 and didn’t know where he was? Going out is fine if the communication was there beforehand like “hey I’m going out drinking with so and so. If I drink too much I’ll just crash at his place. I’ll call/text to let you know” or something. But to just be out until 7? Nah. I’d be worried something bad happened. 
And then you find out he was doing cocaine? After you told him that was a deal breaker for you? 
I guess now it’s up to you how much of an actual “deal breaker” that was. I’m genuinely curious as to how you plan to deal with this. Do you stick with it and leave him because he broke a hard boundary for you? Or do you forgive and work through it because you’re married and it’s not actually a “deal breaker?”

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Even if him going out was planned and ok with both of y’all, I don’t think it’s ok. For one, that’s not 90% of everyday peoples married life, but even if that was normal for y’all, he didn’t even take you or include you as his life partner. Not only that, if he needed a break that’s normal but disappearing 7+ hours all night is not normal, he could have just gone out for a couple hours. It would only be ok IF something happen to his phone so he couldn’t update you AND didn’t remember you’re number AND didn’t have a car or directions to get home, and if all that was true I would still be upset about it. Only way I’d be ok with a stunt like this and not say anything, is if he was out and someone died or got seriously hurt so my husband was taking the news bad and reacted by being out all night, As long as he didn’t cheat or lied

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The 5% on here that said no are probably men no way I'd be happy with my husband not coming home

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It depends on what you’ve talked about. Like someone else mentioned you don’t want him driving drunk. If it were my SO I would expect some communication on what the plans are / when they change.

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Did you previously discuss him being out all night?

Is it disrespectful for my husband to go out partying and not come home at night? It’s 7am and he’s still not home

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