Miscarriage

After ttc for about a year, we got a positive test then later learned, after waking up to blood, it was an ectopic pregnancy. I’ve been so sad and I feel so alone, my boyfriend was just deployed to Germany, and I miss him so much on top of this. I have my family, but I don’t think they truly understand. I feel like a piece of me has died and that my body doesn’t work right because why couldn’t the egg just go to my uterus instead. I try to have the outlook that everything happens for a reason but I can’t find the reason behind this, I feel like I’m never going to get over this and I’m going to be stuck in this grief rollercoaster for a while