Safe zone?

Question

I wish I didn't have to live in a world that I knew babies don't survive. I never thought my first pregnancy would end how it did...

Seeing all these pregnant women saying they can't wait to get to the "safe" zone kinda makes me a little bitter. I want to let them know I lost my son at 20 weeks so for me there is no safe zone. I thought I was good after 12 weeks... But halfway through he went to heaven.

I won't burst their bubble. It's not my place. I just wish I wasn't in the position I am. I will never get to enjoy a pregnancy or have a pregnancy with no worry. I don't get that opportunity anymore.

Sometimes it just sucks so bad to be a part of this miscarriage/still birth club that I didn't want to be a part of and I can't leave 😢

Answer

I totally understand. I made it "out of the woods" and still lost my baby. I'm now trying again and I feel the exact same way. I already know I won't just be blissfully happy and content. I'm going to have anxiety and fear. And there won't be any "I'll relax after 12 weeks or 16 weeks". Nope. I'll be terrified until they're in my arms. We lost so much more than babies that others won't be able to fully understand. Unfortunately, there are so many of us in the same boat, but that means we have a lot of support and understanding from one another. Sorry for your loss!  💗

Answer

I totally understand how you feel. Whenever I see a pregnant woman, I want to scream at her to cherish every moment of her pregnancy, to not take it for granted. Everything can change in an instant.

Answer

I'm with you. Now I understand why they say that it is a BLESSING to be pregnant. It truly is and we should appreciate this miracle. When I see women with their children I envy them so so much. I will not hug my baby, never ever. They don't know how lucky they are 😥😢

Answer

I know how you feel. When I was 18/19 weeks, we received the news that our son isn't going to be compatible with live after he is born. Devastated, we couldn't make up our minds on what to do. We finally have and at the end of next month I am going to give birth to him at 32/33 weeks. It's not easy going through the emotions and holidays knowing that in just a few short weeks I won't be pregnant anymore and won't get to bring my baby home. 
Hang in there though. 
May I ask why you say you'll never get to experience being pregnant again?

Answer

I understand. We lost our first daughter to Turner Syndrome when I was 11 weeks pregnant. It steals the innocence of pregnancy from you. I think even women who appear 100% carefree in pregnancy or say "the safe zone", know that loss is always a possibility. Everyone knows miscarriages, stillbirths and infant deaths happen. There is a certain level of innocence, comfort and dependence on the statistics (risk of miscarriage drops to this % at this week and this % at this week...) when you haven't had a loss though. I'm 31 weeks pregnant with our rainbow baby and I'm still not relaxed and feeling safe. I need this baby in my arms.

Answer

I am very sorry for your loss. I also hate to be the part of this club. I was told that seeing baby's heartbeat means that everything will most likely will be all right and then two weeks later boom, "you had a mmc and need to be cleaned". This day sucked out the happiness out of me and out of my future (if Im ever lucky to conceive again) pregnancies. There wont be any naming and nursery decorations shopping before I hold my baby in my arms. How beautifully happy and careless I was just 2 weeks ago...

Answer

I am so sorry for your lose!!! I will keep you in my prayers and may God help you through this tough time!!!

Answer

So sorry for your loss and I totally agree. All I wanted was to see those two lines and now I know that getting pregnant and having a baby are two totally different things.

Answer

I am very sorry for your loss.

Answer

Statistically though the percentage of losses drop at that point. I know more than one person who's children's heart stopped full term. Sometimes life is unfair and we have to loss pieces of ourselves we don't want to give up, but we have to continue on. Sorry for your loss, you're not alone, I know your pain. ❤️

Safe zone?

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