Some days I really hate my husband.

Heres the thing, my husband and I are together for more than 6 years now. We have 2 year old and another one coming. I love my children to bits. Husband and I are solid but once we got married I had to move in with his parents because they were "chill" parents. They weren't. They were verbally abusive with their constant belittling me as a mom to my then new born child. They never made space for me in the house. I felt suffocated with them. There was always argument and it caused me to cry almost every day. My husband said he was on my side but not every argument he defends me because in his terms he wants to win the war not the battle. His mom was adamant of not letting us move out because we were considered unfillial to abandon to old folks all alone. Well they really had it coming. My mil called me a cruel mom because I sleep trained my child. We only managed to move out after 2 horrible years with them. It has mentally scarred me. Even now when we have moved out, my relationship with my husband has been changed. I dont see him as the man I've once loved. I really feel the relationship is so flawed. I have always blamed him for making me staying with his parents which he also defends as he didnt know his parents are like that. I went into horrible depression and lost so much weight. Now when I look at my husband, I dont feel that I love him anymore. I am always blowing up at him and just can't stand him. Although I know he is trying his best. Everything mistakes he does just reminds me of the bad things his parents did. How do I even overcome this? Has anyone got passed this with their spouse?