Husband wants to live with family forever?

Question

He told me yesterday that he doesn’t understand why everyone doesn’t jus live with their family until they die.. especially if you have a good relationship with them. 
He complains about being at my family’s house bc it’s too small 🥴 wants to go live with his dad where 5 people and 3 animals live. We would bring us and our almost newborn baby and dog. So then there would be 8 people and 4 animals in one house. 
I ask him can we please get an apartment. He says renting is pointless but we are not able to get a mortgage right now. I’m finishing up school ( 12 months left) and he works like 35-38 hours a week only making $17/hr) 
He literally keeps saying he wishes we could live with his family till they die or Atleast 10 years. He doesn’t understand why I do not agree with that.. idk what to do! I can’t look at apartments or condos cause “that’s pointless” and we can’t even look at houses right now cause we are grinding right now. I don’t want to go move in and have 8 people living in a house and I also agree yes my families house is a bit small. It’s like 974 square feet and it’s my grandpa grandma me husband and the dog. 3 bedrooms + basement. Now that I’m pregnant we don’t stay in the basement. So it’s pretty cramped. I just want our own space and he wants to live with family forever. Any advice?

Answer

He sounds like a bum. Wants to live off someone else instead of being a responsible adult and getting a place for his little family. I say look into daycare and get a full time job yourself. Then look for an apartment that you can afford without him.

Answer

Yep… sounds like he wants to leech. Ew tell him to grow up he has his own family that he can live with forever

Answer

Multigenerational lifestyle is on the rise again. Especially in times were child care as well as the care for the elderly is reaching a unaffordable high, multigenerational living offers a good alternative. In many cultures it is a given. As long as the place you share has enough space for people to have some privacy when needed I don't see the problem. It takes a village to raise a child and having grandparents right there can be extremely helpful.

Answer

Sounds like he needs a lot of growing up to do still. Plus he should start looking for another job making $17 and hr and only working those hours no overtime seems not enough for me. Plus a baby. I live in Az , making $17 an hr how expensive everything is , We couldn’t make it.

Answer

Yikes! That would not be okay with me. I know that multigeneration homes are okay with some people, but that's not me at all. My husband and I both agreed before marriage that under no circumstances would family ever live with us. If he changed his mind and told me he wanted to live with family? That would be a deal breaker for me.

Answer

Although I do agree with you, I would definitely want my own place, but one $17 an hour income is likely not enough to sustain an apartment for three people plus pets. So until one or both of you get a better paying job, I would live in the place that has more space or live separately. I certainly do not agree with his opinion to stay with his parents until they die. It is normal and natural to want to be out on your own ￼ and have your own space and build your own life together. It sounds like the two of you need to decide what you want to do. He’s not the only one who gets a say. If the goal is to get a house, then I would recommend staying where you are as long as you can so you can save up for that. Once you get an apartment, your friends are all into that apartment, especially on a low income, there will be nothing to say is left over. so choose wisely, and really think about this. On the other hand, I do not think that renting is a waste. You’re paying to live somewhere that is being maintained and cared for by someone else and that’s worth it in my opinion. I have friends that are working 70 hour work weeks struggling to keep their homes, financed and maintained, but in the end they will have property that belongs to them. I have chosen to stay in my rental, and I do not have to work 70 hours a week and feel a lot more financial freedom than they do. So there are advantages either way.

Answer

I would absolutely want my own apartment. However to be fair, $17/h for a single income household is extremely tight, might not be a bad idea to live with family for another year or 2 to save up so you can move out comfortably

Husband wants to live with family forever?

Let’s Glow

Glow is here for you on your path to pregnancy

25+ million

4.8 stars

20+

Getting Pregnant

Pregnancy

1st Year (Baby & You)

Baby Products