Is ghosting ever excusable?

Met this guy about 3 years ago now while he was in town for work. We hit it off great, he went home we stayed in contact. There was about a year or year & a half we didn't talk because I got into a relationship but we ended up reconnecting & I even flew out to see him. The same day I flew back home he found out his brother had suddenly passed from an accident & he went ghost for 9 months. I even made a post on whether I should keep reaching out & was advised not to so he could process everything. I'm really understanding when it comes to sudden deaths like that & last thing I'd want to do is upset him more. I pretty much gave up on us ever talking again & wanted luv to reach out to me. He reached out to me recently though about how he misses me & wishes I would've reached out the times I thought about it but didnt & we've started chatting again. I told one of my best friends & her response was "so what's his excuse for ghosting you?" & I told her "um.. his brother died...?" & She tells me about how that's not a good excuse at all & he was definitely doing something shady in those 9 months. Keep in mind I'm not pouring my heart into this situationship. It's more we like each other, but because of distance we don't want to hold each other back so seeing where it goes (we both eventually want to work remote). I just need more opinions on whether or not this is a good excuse or am I just letting my heart speak more than my brain. I just know when I lost my dad at a young age I cut everyone off without even realizing it & I feel like I can empathize, but I also tend to listen with my heart more than anything (big flaw I recognize, but struggle fixing lol)