Christmas and Family

My parents are very very traditional and very short fused and always think about what others will think. I’ve been with my long distance bf for 3 years now. We’re both 19. He spent Christmas with us in 2021. I’ve never spent Christmas eve or Christmas with anyone but my two parents. I’ve never had a Christmas amongst friends,etc. We have our own traditions and I’ve gotten used to them.

This Christmas I was invited by my bf family to visit, stay for all of winter break, and celebrate Christmas with them. I was super excited as I love his family. They’re so sweet, welcoming and overall lovely. I asked my mom about it, and she asked if I don’t like her anymore, and that if I’m not happy with her then I should just leave. I explained to her that I don’t feel that way, and that I wanted to simply enjoy a new type of Christmas. She then told me to ask my dad, saying that I’ll start another war between myself and him. I mentioned it to him and he immediately told me to go and not come back. He said that If I want to go so badly, then he’s get me the ticket now.

I was super upset about this.

After speaking to my mom again, she agreed and I worked on the dates that I could go visit my bf and his family. I then purchased the tickets with my own money. And for a while I was super excited, but now I’m nervous.

I feel like I’m going to hurt my parents and that they’re going to hate me.So I’m scared to go.

I’ve prepared for my Christmas trip and I got my parents their gifts and am planning on FaceTiming them on Christmas eve to watch them open gifts and talk to them about their dinner.

I want to enjoy Christmas. It means a lot to me. But I’m scared that by going I’ll cause a huge problem. They keep mentioning how a girl should never go to some guy, and that people view it as wrong. They also say that it’s not nice or respectful for someone to just spend 3 weeks at someone’s house. I spoke with my bfs parents regarding this and his mom found me my flights. She was ready to have me stay for a month.

I feel welcomed by his family.

It’s my parents that I’m scared and worried about.

There’s no way to talk to them. I’m wrong because I’m inexperienced, young and stupid.

I value their thoughts but I don’t always agree with them. I try to stand up for my self and talk to them, but it’s practically impossible and just ends in a screaming match.

I’ll try to make the best of this Christmas.

Do you think I’m doing the wrong thing?