Ah I am to scared to test!!

I have conformation that I did ovulate bloods at 6dpo was 65 nmol/l anything over 30 means ovulation has occurred. I’m either 12/13dpo today. I haven’t tested yet.

I had a pregnancy in in September (found out on the day my period was to arrive after I had bleeding that was pregnant) scans and bloods where showing everything was ok but sadly lost the baby in October at 6w4d. I’m just scared to test I don’t want to get my hopes up. I am ttc 4 year one pregnancy in September and on clomid and metformin.

I won’t test till after tomorrow to be sure that’s even if I bring myself to take a test.