How do you do it - be a single mother

I'm one of these. I have absolutely no support.

First of all, fuck the medical field's recommendations... some of their recommendations are unsafe. It's perfectly safe and NECESSARY to leave your baby alone some times so you can shower or just enjoy some solitude. You have to do it and no, your baby won't burst into flames just because you're out of sight for 15 minutes. Just do it the right way and they'll be fine.

I did it by choosing priorities and by utilizing student loans to my advantage. I was almost done with my Bachelor's when I got pregnant, so I was making around 15 dollars an hour. Without student loans, it would have been really hard. However, I chose to stick it out and use the loans to get my master's. I'll be making 70 dollars an hour take home by May 2023. It is doable. You just have to prioritize. My house has been way messier than I'd prefer, I have more debt than I prefer, and I go out to eat way more than I'd prefer, but I know that it's all temporary and it'll be worth it. And I am so fucking proud of myself. I went from the absolute deepest, darkest pits of hell when I was postpartum and I'm now six months away from my dream career and my dream life. So many people told me to give up custody or stay in an abusive relationship until I was done with school. Fuck. That. Find a way. There is always a way.

I’m not a single mother… but my husband is deployed a lot and I don’t live near family… I would never actually compare to the struggles of a single mother because damn you guys go through so much and y’all are so strong 💜 you’re my heroes seriously 💜

I just wanted to say about the showering thing… like I have three kids and no help and when my partner is deployed across the world… I have to wait until the kids are in bed and sometimes the baby screams on the monitor and I just want to wash my hair 😪

Sometimes baby has to fuss so you can do what you’ve gotta do.. stay strong 💜💜

I know it’s pretty amazing huh!

A lot I’m sure bet child support so they can afford daycare/home/expenses all that

A lot bring their baby in the bathroom with them to shower. Put in their high chair with an activity

It has to be so exhausting! Always so impressed with women who can do it all on their own

Girl it’s been tough! Finally luckily I’ve been ok with a decent paying job. But I can’t do anything alone . I pee while holding my daughter bc she always needs constant skin to skin she would scream her head off the min I put her down. She cried a lot 2-3 hours colicky in the evenings. Showers I just bring one of her baby chairs in the bathroom while I rush through my shower . It got a tad better when she got older and could crawl or even walk. But still needs constant skin to skin. When I cook I would have to put her in a baby carrier . Let’s just say purely exhausting on top of working full time as an RN in the hospital during a pandemic and during a horrible 3 years divorce !!!! Fast forward she’s 4 now so the more independence she gained slightly gave me a tiny bit of a break . But unmmm this is f*king hard. The mental and emotional exhaustion is unbearable sometimes . I def was experiencing burn out from being a single mom on top of burn out from medical field and on top of divorce . Lots and lots and lots of therapy to try to self preserve and heal to be the best mommy I can

Is not easy but I have my mom take care of my daughter when I got to do something where I can’t bring her with me or work but every where else I take her with me (obgyn, wax appointment, dentist, stores) it gets better the more they get older because their less needy, I went thru hell with my daughter the first year.

Why does this OP think you can’t put a baby in a safe place (crib?) by itself? This post is a little condescending to me.

I know plenty of single mothers out there slaying it. When life gives you a lemon, you step up to the plate and hit it out of the park bc when your back is up against the wall you find out what you’re really made of.

I cannot fathom the struggle and hustle required of a single mother. They are literally super heros!

I work from home. I hire a babysitter for a few hours per day. I shower and have ME time before baby wakes in the morning and after baby has gone to sleep at night. It is not easy but not impossible. Everyday it is me and my kid and the babysitter comes over to care for them, in my home, when I need some help, alone time, work overtime, need to get errands done. For 23 months, it was only me and my kid, and then I finally introduced the babysitter for more than just 6 hours per day, so I can start to have a personal life again. It is all manageable with planning, time, scheduling and putting efforts in but always taking into consideration your child(ren) first. It is getting easier as my kid is getting older. You got this!

I’m blessed to have more support now my daughter is almost 6 but for a very long time we just had each other. Honestly, it’s REALLY hard at times and I would often feel like I was underwater with my arms flailing 😅 But I can only speak for myself in saying the love that burns inside me for my baby was fuel.

There’s no real manual for any parents, whether you have support or not and so you make anything necessary happen.