Hi,

I am an FT mom. I wonder if it's only me or there are others like me.

I miss myself being pregnant, every memory of the 40 weeks make me cry. Those were the best days of my life. I learnt to love self, care the most and be selfish about things I wanted in life. I liked how everyone loved, cared and were concerned for me - what I had longed for throughout my life. I miss my hospital and midwife appointments. I miss the anxiety before scans. I miss everything. I miss this baby growing inside me, making different moves, making me read 100s articles off the internet. This hit me first time when I was 39 weeks and realized that this was the last week. I am a person who doesn't like sudden transitions and this was one such - transition from one best world to another but I couldn't take my own time and say a proper goodbye to the pregnancy.

Dont get me wrong - I love my baby to the infinity. I thought, planned and prepared so much before her arrival but now I am doing only the basics. It may be because of how I feel about the void I am left in after 40 weeks. It may also be because of how the birth went (that's something I will try to talk about in another post, I really need to!!). Or may be because of the caserean wound recovery etc.

Anyone who can understand and have ways to come out of this?