New mom, but not really

Although I have two older children (10 and 6) I feel like a first time mom. I thought I would have so much confidence with this baby (born 2/3/23) but instead I have even more anxiety. I was first diagnosed with postpartum anxiety after my first child. It manifested in anger towards my husband and developed into general anxiety disorder. I’ve been on prescriptions since then and then when I had my second, it was a bit easier to manage. Now that my third is here I just feel all over the place. Every time he makes a noise I think he’s choking. I have constant thoughts that something bad is gonna happen to him. I know that my hormones are all over from just giving birth but when will that balance out? With all the news about that woman and postpartum psychosis, i get worried that what I’m feeling isn’t normal. Sorry for the rant. Just needed to write how I am feeling.