What would you do?

Question

What would you do if your with a guy for 2 years, have a baby together and he finally tells you about his mental health which is, he’s a narcissist, explosive personality disorder, ocd and depression. Our relationship is rocky however what would you do in this situation?

Answer

People can have those things and live a good life, but it’d be very hard. If you feel incapable of helping him, if he makes you feel threatened or unsafe, if you can’t trust him, those are reasons to leave.

Answer

If he had actual diagnosed mental health concerns as mentioned above, you’d have known.

Answer

I would leave him because he took 2 years to be honest. Lying and withholding (same difference) and not acceptable, to me, in a relationship. I would work to co-parent with him and maybe one day even become friends too. But nothing more.

Answer

Well I would think you’ve seen some of this behavior? Because if you’ve been together a while and have had a kid…but your just finding out now , I think he’s incredible at masking.

Answer

I don’t know because I have never knowingly been around someone with everything you’ve mentioned. Depression, I would be supporting my husband however he needs me to. I haven’t really been around someone with ocd so I don’t know. Explosive personality disorder, again, I don’t know because I have never experienced it. Narcissism, my MIL is the worst and she was draining as hell. I don’t think that I could be married to someone like that.
I guess if I were you I’d look at everything as a whole. Were you guys having issues before this? Are you looking at him differently now because he has shared this with you? Do you feel loved, respected, safe? If the relationship has been great and he’s a good father, I’d suggest making sure he’s being treated however he needs to be, maybe couples counseling. If it’s too much for you, end the relationship but keep in mind you still have to coparent with him.

Answer

I wouldn’t be with someone like that. I grew up with a mother that was diagnosed with NPD and other things. It’s a very abusive and toxic environment to be in.

Answer

I would quietly make a plan to leave his ass . People like that unfortunately do not change. You don’t want your baby growing up in an environment like that. Plus, he lied to you about his mental health…that’s huge . What else is he lying about ?! However, lying goes hand in hand with narcissism. You’re likely trauma bonded to him so you may have mixed feelings about leaving. There’s 7 billion people in the world . There’s no need to keep wasting your time on a disordered person who isn’t owning their shit. I wasted 5 years of my life …my ex was hugely abusive on every level. He wasn’t diagnosed but I have a strong feeling he is narcissistic/sociopathic. These kinda guys/people don’t get better as time goes on. They get worse.

What would you do?

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