Work Issue, When to tell them I’m pregnant

The first of the year my small company got a new operating system. It is god awful and puts us back into 1998. It’s barely operational for us and slows us down tremendously. Also the month of January we received 32 new projects for our team of 4. Out of the 32 16 we’re mine and the rest were among the other 3. This caused me to get backlogged on older projects because I was slammed and what used to take 3 hours now took 7 or 8 to complete with the new system.

I unexpectedly was out of the office for a little over a week. I had Covid which hit me hard but I only took two days off. Then my daughter caught a stomach bug and I took a day off to run around catching puke from a 14 month old. Then my 14 month old had a seizure that lasted 5 minutes and 45 seconds. We ended up hospitalized for over a week and I took the week off that I was in the hospital with her and the day after she released to follow up with her doctor. We have a few other tests and upcoming appointments I took off for. Mind you I have the PTO time.

Now my job is saying they’re a small company and don’t have appropriate back up and it’s backing up the entire team and I need to come into the office as much as possible between the doctors appointments. (We have been remote 4 days in office 1) to deal with the back log. So essentially I feel like I’m being punished because my kid got sick and had a seizure and now has a diagnosed epileptic disorder among other health issues we are just finding out about.

I was going to tell them I was pregnant after my NIPT came back but that was during the time I had COVID and wasn’t in the office. I’m now going on 16 weeks and know I need to tell them soon but how they’re reacting to my daughter being sick and the unplanned time off is making me concerned.

We do not have HR. We have 13 people in our company total. I have been there for 9 years at this point. And my only write up has ever been when I got backed up after having to help (by management’s direction) a coworker who was backed up and did his work for a week to dig him out of his hole and as a result got backed up on my own projects.