Anyone with stepkids?

Question

I love my two stepkids to death. I introduce them as my own and my husband and I have full custody. Their moms are pieces of crap. I feel exhausted trying to prove myself to them constantly. I feel like I give them more attention than my own daughter because I want to prove that it is better at my house. They make me a better person and I wouldn't change that but it's so tiring. I feel like I don't have any more to give to another child for example. 
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​Mostly a vent.

Answer

I have a 8 year old stepson. I have been in his life since before his 3rd birthday and we have the same struggle that many of you have. The bio mom is an unbeliever and my husband and I are Christians and that is how we live and raise our boy (my stepson). It is 50/50 custody but we end up having more time with him. The biomimetic is jealous of my relationship with our boy because she has not been able to release her party ways and grow up into a responsible mother. My husband and I are just starting TTC and I am fearful what she is going to try to do against our family when we get pregnant. She took us to court 3 days before our wedding to try to take our boy away from us... Our boy talks all the time about being a big brother and how many kids he wants daddy and I to have :) being a parent is WAY more than just DNA. No matter how many times you hear that you aren't the mom, remember, you are investing  and choosing to love! We are parents 100% to Allof our children.

Answer

I have a 7 month old step daughter who was the product of an affair.  Hard situation in the first place but even harder since I lost my 6 month old in a horrible accident last year and we've had trouble TTC for 7 months now after I had a tubal reversal.  My life sounds like a jerry springer episode!! Lol BUT in reality I love my step daughter and some times I don't know how id make it without her in my life.... Despite the circumstance she came from and my hatred toward  her mother! :-)

Answer

I have 3 step kids and none if my own. We have full custody their mother has drug problems. The youngest is 8 and I'm the only mother he has known the middle is 11 and she adores me. The oldest is 14 and I have the hardest time with her. Her mother leaving really messed her up! Her mother also told her before she left them that my husband is not her biological dad which he knew but was waiting till she was older to tell her. She has been in and out of phyc wards for suicide abd depression and I try so hard to connect with her but it never happens. It's not just you it's hard and I bet it's even harder when the other parent is in their lives because your constantly waging war to find a routine.

Answer

I have a 4 year old stepdaughter with Down Syndrome and some other health issues. She is just the sweetest, happiest little girl. I never had a problem bonding with her, since she's still so young. Her mother is the tricky one to interact with. When my husband and her were married, she's the one who cheated and left the marriage. Legally they share custody 50/50, but we actually have her more often. But her mom doesn't like when I have any involvement, even I pick her up from daycare. 
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​Despite the fact that she dislike me and that I don't always agree with her actions, I am always civil towards her and even though I have vented to some friends about some of the things she's done, I NEVER EVER vent in front of my stepdaughter and I never trash talk her. No matter what she may say to me or about me, I don't want that little girl to have feel any additional negativity from my end.

Answer

I have a 6 year old step son , I also have a 6 year old son of my own - I empathise fully with how you feel !! we have weekend and holiday access to my step son only and when he's with us our routine gets thrown out the window , he doesn't like sharing , he demands a lot too but I don't blame him as my son and I have his dad every day so I don't mind him wanting his dads full attention on the weekends :) it's under stand able . I had the step mum from hell as a child so I am very conscious I do not want to turn out like her !!! I try my best and he his treated the same as my own son . We are TTC our first child together at the moment :)

Answer

I have a 12 yr old step-to-be (getting married in June)and none of my own. I wish we had full custody his mom is crazy and hateful and a horrid mother. After almost 5 years she still wants her ex back and tells our son lies about me. He and I have a great relationship. But I know once I get preg she is going to try to convince him that his dad and I won't love or want him after we have our own.  She doesn't let me go to Dr appt and he has lots of health issues so I feel like an outsider often also

Answer

I have 4. I agree its very tiring. It is a hard task to forge that relationship, especially once they reach a certain age and their mothers speak negatively of you. 
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​It has been a struggle for me, though I love them as my own. But it is also very hard when I dont have the closeness I wish I would with them, and also dont have a biological child of my own. 
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​Sometimes i feel like im on the outside looking in :(

Anyone with stepkids?

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