I messed up.

Today I took 2 hpt at various times with the same positive result. And I feel stupid, so bloody stupid because I'm newly single (bit over a month) and my ex is with someone new and I only just started my new job and I finally had things sorted and knew what I wanted to do and then this happens and I can't tell him because i don't want to ruin anything between them and I know he doesn't want kids yet, and not with me definitely now since we're "just friends" and I don't think I could go through with an abortion because everyone knows everyone's business in my small town and the horrific things people who have been to the abortion clinic have gone through I don't think I could and I haven't told anyone because I don't know what to do.