10 Jobs I’m now qualified for since I Added ‘Parenting’ To My Resume.

Although I’ve been home with my kids for the last 5 years,  I have never thought of my situation as a permanent break from the workforce.

Don’t get me wrong; I have no regrets with my current at home position at all, in fact I love being able to be here at this stage in the game.  There are some things from the workforce that I miss though like the adult interaction, for example.  In fact, that’s one of the main reasons I started blogging.

Conversations with a then 5, 3, and 1 year old kids can only take an adult so far.  You start to realize that your brain needs another level of engagement when you seriously begin answering Dora with, “The Map! The Map, damn you!”

Next year my youngest will be starting all day Kindergarten, so recently I’ve been thinking about what I’ll be doing with my free time while all three kids are in school all day. Writing?  Trying to get back into the workforce?  Sitting around in my PJ pants, eating bon-bons and watching soap operas?

Each scenario has clearly has its benefits.

Thinking further, what would I do if I returned to the workforce?  Go back to corporate training (which was my last gig), or perhaps try something new?  At first I was a bit worried about my resume gap, but then, as I thought about it, parenting has given me all kinds of new skillz!  In fact, should I decide to return to work, I’d have so many new opportunities to choose from thanks to all the new qualifications I’ve developed since becoming a parent.

1.  Cruise Director - From the time my kids were old enough to sit up on their own, even before they were able to speak, I’ve been getting the look that says, “Entertain me!”  Of course now they are old enough to speak, and unless it’s allotted screen time, I usually have at least one kid per 20 minutes audibly expressing their boredom and their need to tell me they don’t know what to do!  Of course, I can’t say they always like my suggestions.  So whether cruise activities were swimming, playing shuffle board, or cleaning their own cabins, this cruise director can always find something to do!

2.  Hostage Negotiator –  You may think I’m being dramatic, or that there would be no way that without proper training I could be qualified for a job like this, but if you’re entire family has ever been held up because your toddler refuses to put on pants so you can all go enjoy the zoo, park, or any other activity that society requires be done while wearing pants, then you know exactly what I’m saying.  Sure, you’re the parent and you could just make her put on the damn pants, but then there’s crying, yelling, and other unpleasantries that I prefer to avoid before even stepping out the door.  The key of course, is making her think that you’re on her side, and that you just want to help her.  You gain her trust, speak in a soothing tone, and make her believe that wearing pants is her idea.  After a standoff that lasts minutes, but feels like hours, she gives up and puts on pants!  A win for the good guys!  Until she says she has to pee…