Move in with bf before or after marriage??

Question

So my bf and I have a reaccuring conversation... whether to move in together before or after marriage. He says he wants to make sure he gets along with someone before getting married, therefore move in before. I personally would rather wait till after marriage. For religous reasons, and the simple fact of wanting being married to be different than dating. It would be something more to look forward to... especially since I dont have my virginity for marriage anymore...  what do you all think?!?!?

Answer

My husband and I have lived together for 3 years before getting married. Marriage can be hard enough without learning each other's quirks. It's true what they say- you don't really know someone until you live with them. Also, it gives you two a way to establish finances before marriage. I think the benefits of living together prior to marriage significantly outweighs waiting until marriage to live together. I can't imagine not living together first, but that's just my personal opinion. Do whatever makes you comfortable

Answer

I understand why people say living together before marriage is nice to see if you're compatible and you can find out each other's living habits, but if you're planning on marrying this person, it shouldn't matter what their living habits are. Anyone you live with is going to drive you crazy at times, whether it's your husband, roommate, or other family,but the commitment of marriage is to love the person no matter what bad habits they have. Don't get me wrong, though, it is a big adjustment! My hubby drives me nuts with leaving dirty clothes on the floor or dishes in his office.

Answer

We did not live togeather before marriage, there were no surprises.  He didnt pick up his clothes when we dated, he didnt start picking them up after we married.  If you already spend a significant amout of time togeather you already know all their quirks.

Answer

When we got engaged we stopped having sex so that we had something to look forward to. We only had a 4 1/2 month engagement though. I also waited until the wedding day to move in with him. There's no reason you should move in beforehand to find out about habits. Marriage is all about compromise and working through those things. If you moved in beforehand and y'all didn't like little things would you actually call off a wedding because of it? Most likely not. I have no regrets moving in after marriage.

Answer

If you won't live with him for religious reasons but you've already had sex with him, I would say might as well move in. Or move in after you get engaged close to the wedding date.

Answer

In my opinion, move in. Who're marriage. We waited to move on until after our wedding ( my moms insistence). It made the adjustment to married life harder. I had been with him for 8 years before getting married and knew him well but living together is a whole different thing. It sounds silly but it's getting used to your husbands quirks and habits.... Balancing the chores, sharing finances..( plus hubby doesn't adjust to new things well haha).. It took its toll on us.... We fought all the time until we found a balance and compromise. With all that being said its your choice but if I could do it all over I would have moved in like 6 months to a year before the wedding

Answer

My boyfriend and I moved in together after a month. It was convenient and clearly it worked out, since we've been together for almost four and a half years now. I don't think we'd be together had we not moved in together when we did. There are a lot of factors that go into it. The money issues, getting used to sharing, splitting bills, etc. are all big things, and I'm glad we worked them out when we did and we have our system now. I don't regret moving in together so fast for a second, but I know everyone is different. Just consider everything before you make the decision. For us it was just natural, it made sense.

Answer

I Would try a Compromise.. Staying at each other's house on weekends or a couple nights a week.

Answer

I think his point is that you really don't know someone until you've lived with them for an extended period of time (like a year or more). And he's right. You don't.

When you don't live together, you don't notice how much he farts, how dirty he makes the toilet, his utter inability to correctly load the dish washer and put a new role of toilet paper on the bar. You don't see him picking his nose, or getting excess skin off his feet, you don't hear how he snores, or how he throws away every important paper on the kitchen table (even though he SWORE he looked at all of it). The list goes on.

I will always live with someone before I marry them. I don't really have any pet peeves - the above examples don't bother me in the least, and nothing else my SO does bothers me either. But some things - especially a bunch of little things that turn in to big things - can be a deal breaker for a lot of people.

Answer

You can make the choice to stop sleeping together and wait untill you're married. Then you will have a lot to look forward to. I did =)

Move in with bf before or after marriage??

Let’s Glow

Glow is here for you on your path to pregnancy

25+ million

4.8 stars

20+

Getting Pregnant

Pregnancy

1st Year (Baby & You)

Baby Products