Does it bother you if people say your baby doesn't look like you?

Question

At my 20 week ultrasound, I got my pics and sent them to family, one of which was a 3D picture (and it wasn't very clear). My MIL immediately mentioned that our baby looks like her son (my hubby). I was taken aback by this a little, like, "you can determine that based on one unclear 3D image?" I think I am wrong, and it's just my hormones, but I feel like she's only interested in the baby if it looks like my hubby (who looks the most like her out of the three siblings). She said the same thing to my SIL when my SIL had a baby boy. I think it'll be great to have our little girl look like my hubby, I guess I just feel a little irked by that comment. Anyone else felt the same when people made similar comments?

Answer

I could see my preggo hormones being bothered by that, so I totally understand why you would get sort of defensive :)  But when I think about it logically, I don't think it's a big deal. Everyone is going to see bits and pieces of momma and daddy in baby, it just depends on which features they focus on. Plus, I'm pretty sure my kids will all look like my husband, our son is his little twin lol. So I'll be surprised if baby#2 looks like me lol

Answer

My son will be 3 at the end of the month. My MIL says ALL the time how he looks just like daddy, blah blah blah... He may look like daddy right now because we dress them alike and he has short hair, but if you compare our baby/toddler pictures-- he is like my little mini-me!

I really can't understand why it gets brought up so much, or why she seems so insistent on it. Regardless of what he looks like, he's still your grandson! Does it make you prouder of him? I wish we could all just be happy that he exists instead of trying to take personal credit for his traits!

Answer

My oldest who is 3 looks like both of us. A very good mixture but I get looks sometimes especially when he was first born or even asked is he mine because he is white. Looks like a white person gave birth to him. His dad of course is white and I'm black. It doesn't really bother me anymore because I know he's mine and that's all that matters, lol. We are on baby #2 that is a girl, I'm curious as to who she will look like and the color of her skin. I know my son surprised the heck out of me. Didn't expect it. First picture maybe a month old second pic is present.

Answer

Sounds like a narcissist.

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3D ultrasounds do not give a good idea of what baby actually looks like, in my experience. MIL's ALWAYS say baby looks like their son. It's their thing.  I had my first at 32 weeks and while I was getting sewed back up they rolled him by me on the way to the NICU. I took one look at him and my reaction in my head was "holy shit he looks exactly like my husband". To this day he is my husbands twin and that's all I hear all the time.  It totally gets old and annoys me sometimes, but he's adorable so I don't care too much.  It was obnoxious at first, though.

Answer

I actually WANTED my DD to look like my hubby (in a more feminine way, of course😜), but everyone says she has more of my features. I was initially sad after my 3D ultrasound where I started getting the "she looks like you!" comments, but now that she is born, she is absolutely beautiful, and I wouldn't want her any other way! 😊

Answer

I have three sons and 2 of them look very much like me, the littlest one is nearly identical to me (the only one who is blond, my husband had nearly black hair from birth.) My MIL always comments how all of my kids look like my husband or look like her. It pissed me off so bad (our oldest is 10 so that's how long I've been hearing it) that I went off on her at Thanksgiving.

We're preggers again and let me tell you, if she so much as opens her mouth..................

Answer

My son is basically a miniature version of my husband. I love it now, but when he was first born I was disappointed that I couldn't claim anything about his appearance, especially after being sick for his entire pregnancy. I definitely understand being particularly irked when hearing this from your MIL. I feel the same way even though it's true and she doesn't say it to hurt my feelings. Just recognize that she is probably not trying to be rude, and just wait until you can hold that little bundle in your arms. He or she will be the most beautiful thing you've ever seen regardless of who it favors.

Answer

Well, baby is going to look like either your or your spouse. To get offended, I'm confused. I mean, if she was saying that the baby looks nothing like you or your husband, then I could understand better. I have gotten upset over things, so yes I truly understand there. I really do. Try to not think about it. I don't think she meant harm. My daughter looks nothing like me. I'm tan, dark brown hair, brown eyes, and my daughter, pale, blonde, and hazel eyes lol. She looks nothing like me. I've had people ask me where her mom was. Lol. To explain that she is biologically mine, I get weird looks. I've been tempted to just tell people I stole her from the hospital. But that would be bad lol.

Answer

Well damn. I tell my best friend all the time how her little girl looks more and more like her daddy. I never thought there would be a problem with it. This is making me question if she gets upset when I say it. Is there anything you can say anymore with out offending people? 😐

Does it bother you if people say your baby doesn't look like you?

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