50 shades of grey?! Submissive and Dominate

Question

I didn't read the book I heard a bunch of stuff about it, so I rented the movie and was completely weirded out by the whole concept of submissive and Dominate. Why is this sexy why do women want to be put in situations like that? I think that this is plain gross. Young girls are going to watch this and think it's normal. Why is this okay⁉️

Answer

As both a member of the BDSM community AND an abuse survivor that has read the books let me tell you a few things. 
50 shades of shit is NOT by any means a true or healthy depiction of BDSM or kink. 50 shades of shit is a romanticized depiction of a manipulative abuser under the guise of BDSM and kink. 
There is nothing wrong with domination and submission in a lifestyle or bedroom as long as the decision is consensual and INFORMED on both parts. The first and foremost main tenet of the Kink community is "safe, sane, and consensual". There is a laundry list of things wrong with this series that goes against that main tenet on its own, and that's not beginning to count the violations of contract protocol or anything else.
I am all for people, not just women, making informed choices about their sexuality and how they go about fulfilling it. I am all for demystifying the BDSM community and kink at large. I am all for bringing out 'alternative' lifestyles and sexual practices for normalization. But holding up 50 shades as the prime example is horrific and downright dangerous.

Answer

That movie and those books are a terrible depiction of the BDSM community. It's abuse masquerading as BDSM. The books are actually based off of a Twilight fan fiction.

Answer

It's not "gross" at all. If you don't want your child reading it then don't let them.. I think BDSM can totally spice up a a sex life! However as other women are saying 50 shades of grey is not an accurate portrayal of that life style. I still like the movies though and will continue to watch them and have my boyfriend spank me in the bedroom ;)

Answer

It wasn't a good portral of BDSM. I was bored throughout the whole movie. It screamed romance novel, so at least they got that down.

I do enjoy being taken advantage of, I just don't understand why women want to just give in. I want to be chased and fought with. The whole point of real dominance*. Sure you can buy that sex swing or whatever, but did he put you in it? or did you help him or willing go? If you can't show me your strength, than you have a weak mind.

Also, why would you ever let a kid see this??

Answer

Well an actual Dom/sub relationship is very different than what happens in that story. It's not my thing, but as long as each person goes into it fully aware and willing to follow the boundaries, then to each their own.

Answer

It is normal, some people some people don't. Its not like it infers with your sex life. As long the Don't abuses they partners and communicate well with each other then why does it matter to what they do?

Answer

Ooh my boyfriend is Mr grey n I'll forever be his submissive.

Answer

It's more the love they have for each other that made me love the movie. I mean, I would love if my SO took a FEW pointers from Christian, but I'm not into getting whipped and "punished" (totally not judging anyone who is into that). I just love how in LOVE they are, but they are too stubborn to realize it. You should really read the book. The movie is just a paraphrased version of the first book. :)

50 shades of grey?! Submissive and Dominate

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