Advice for the baby impaired.

I had my tubes cut tied and burned 7 years ago after my third child. Now I've been in a new relationship for nearly two years and my SO has no children but really wants one. I Cannot afford the reversal surgery and I'm already in my early 30s. Well, every month that AF is late, I go on hpt bingers and spend a ridiculous amount of money KNOWING I cant get pregnant. Then, when AF does show, I spend days and days depressed. I just keep hoping I'll be one of those people whose ligations fail. Any advice or hope anyone can give me? I'm making myself crazy!!!