Depression and anxiety

For as long as I can remember I've had depression and anxiety. And it's literally exhausting... I can't even stand being in my own head becuase I constantly worry about everything. I feel numb inside and I'm very rarely happy. I'm thinking about going back to a psychiatrist for medication, I was on some but it didn't help me. My question is, is there anyone out there who is effectively dealing with this... I feel so alone... I don't want to rely on medication I try so hard to push through it but I feel like I can't even have relationships becuase I feel like no one likes me so I push everyone away.... I'm so exhausted