My ex is supposed to be getting out of jail soon. It is a scary thought. I met him when I was 13 just started high school. He was a senior and I thought hey how cool I'm dating a senior and 18. I didn't realize the kind of person he was. Noone did. He was the nice guy that everyone adored but also a nerd. He convinced me to constantly skip school and stuff. He would get mad if I went with my family anywhere. I was 14 when the bad stuff really started.

We were going to his little sisters Christmas play and he stopped at an abandoned gas station. I tried to get away but he forced himself on me and took my virginity. We went to the play and I had to use toilet paper to keep from bleeding through my pants. I kept having me skip school and would take me to his house. I kept fighting back and eventually he got tired of it. He started shooting me up with heroin to keep me from fighting. I have an indentation from my eye socket to above my hairline from where he slammed my head onto the rail of his bed and knocked me out. I thought he wasn't at school one day and so I talked to some friends. I thought wrong. He saw me and at lunch time he found me and started screaming at me at banging my head into the concrete wall. Everyone adults and peers alike saw what was happening but ignored it. One of my friends finally saw and stopped him. The back of my head is flat from this.

I don't understand how so many people could ignore something like that. My parents kept grounding me and what not because they found out I was skipping school but never a dressed the problem. My grandmother found my diary and called the cops. It got him to leave me alone for a while. But the stalking started. Phone calls. If someone else answered he'd hang up. If I answered it was once you are 16 you are mine. But that never happened. Then once I turned 18 was his next conquest. I moved out at 17 and had an apartment. I did not hear from him after changing numbers a gazillion times. I kept a knife under my pillow. I used to have to walk to work and would carry the knife with me. I had gotten stopped by a cop and he confiscated it. Not to long after my apartment was broken into. I was raped by him and another friend. I ran to a gf house covered in blood with gashes all over. I never did call the cops. But I found out a few weeks after he was in jail for attempted murder. His gf was on life support. She eventually recovered. But I felt terrible because if I would have done something she would not have gotten hurt.

I guess there alot of men that saw target on my forehead. I went on to have been assaulted my a coworker. And a few exes. Was in 3 abusive relationships after that. One being an abusive marriage. My first ex is supposed to be getting out of jail soon and it scares me. I've have gone through many precautions over the years to insure he would never find me again. But it still scares me.