Losing my pregnancy today.

After 1.5 years of trying.  Countless appts.  Infertility treatments.  We were pregnant.   It had finally happened.    But 2 days ago I had bleeding and cramping. My hcg was 993.  2 days later 1221. My wonderful doctor said I could hope- but I would likely lose the pregnacy soon.   So here I sit.  Cramping.  Binge watching tv. And waiting. Waiting for the end to come.  Saying goodbye to something we barely had.