Have you ever been in this? Similar?

I moved states to move in with my cousin (best friend at the time) we had a plan to both save up to get a place together (we were at her parents house). Months down the road she says she's not ready and picked fights with me. I had no clue what I was going to do since if I left I would've been homeless but I felt if I stayed it would wreck our friendship. The guy I'd been seeing for only a couple months invited me to move into his/family house and I immediately discarded it because I thought what happens when we breakup? I'd have no where else to go again.. With fights getting worse with my cousin I ended up taking the guy on his offer. About Thanksgiving time he was going to go down with me to meet my family/enjoy a Thanksgiving from a different aspect.. I was having fun with him but was thinking about breaking up with him because I missed home and I missed my ex-love. Shock for me because the guy I was about to break up with contacted my sister&mom, asked my dad for his permission the same week he first met him and proposed to me. Thinking back I don't know I don't know if it was because I was under pressure (he proposed to me in front of my entire family and I'm a private person) or if it was the right choice because in that moment all I remember is thinking is holy shit I can't believe this is happening this can't be happening? Moments later I hear myself said "yes". This month is two years with this guy and almost everyday I still think about my ex. Can I tell myself you did this and bite the bullet? Or go give it another shot with my ex? (And we broke up over silly stuff in high school so no psycho) I haven't done anything because I don't want to make a hasty decision? If you want to be a hater don't comment :)