Why do I feel like

Jess • Hi! Ttc first child. I`m 33 years old. I engaged to a wonderful man and just want to start a family
In the beginning of the month I felt so positive and no I'm being so negative 
I am 12 dpo but I'm scared to text Cuz I don't want to get my hopes shot down but then this not testing is killing me
My bresst hurt I was getting cramps but noe not so much I just don't know what to think