I am 19 and a first time mom. I found out I was pregnant and I was beyond happy. I've always loved the idea of pregnancy. I think it's magical and amazing and God couldn't have made a better way of life. ❤️ 

Well when I found out I fell in love with my precious baby growing inside of my belly. I started watching movies and videos about all kinds of labors and deliveries. The business of being born and even deliveries on YouTube. 

I learned about Pitocin and how it makes contractions stronger and longer and painful for the Mom and he baby. So I became highly against it. 

I also learned about the epidural and induction and c-sections. Breech babies. Anything and everything about labor and delivery. 

Well I decided I did NOT want pitocin ever. I did NOT want an epidural. I did NOT want a c-section. I did NOT want to be induced. 

So when it came around to be my due date my doctor asked me when I wanted to "get this baby out." I told him I wanted her in there as long as possible. Doc said "I'll give you a week" 

So when I heard that I did everything to get my baby out. Dancing. Squats. Sex. Pineapple. Spicy food. Chinese. Jumping jacks. Walking. EVERY day that week. Nothing. No sign of her making her way out. 

So I was induced. 😫 We went in Oct. 19 at 6am. I was having my own contractions but couldn't feel them. So they started pitocin(😣) at 640am. 

I was having contractions every 4 minutes by 8am and was at a 5cm 95% effaced. 

They broke my waters at 815 to "get things going". 

I was having contractions every 2 minutes by 12pm and was at 9cm 95% effaced. Then they made me push. Way too damn early. They were shoving their hands in me trying to move the last of my cervix over her head and it wasn't working. 

At around 3pm after pushing for quite a while and no more thinning of the cervix and dilation. The doc came in and said "we'd advise you to get the epidural to calm yourself down and relax you and the baby. She's face up and needs to rotate." 😣 I agreed but was beyond upset because I hadn't had the epidural the entire time and never wanted it. 

They had me lay three different positions but baby wasn't rotating so I pushed again at 5pm. They gave me an oxygen mask bc the baby needed it. The epidural wore off and I was having horrible back labor and was so pissed that they MADE me get it and let it wear off. 😠

Doc came in and was trying to pry her out with his hands way in me. (Still only at 9 & 95%). Then decided "we need to get this baby out another way". 

Boom. I was BAWLING. My fiancé was too. We were so upset. But by then I was so pissed and hurting I agreed. I just wanted my little girl. 

I then had my csection and my little girl was delivered at 539pm. 

I'm mostly upset bc they rushed me too much. I wasn't even in active labor for more than 5hours. I find myself very emotional over it all. But I just think I have my little girl and that's all that matters. The recovery is horrible though. I can't laugh or it hurts so bad I cry. I can't pee without contracting and it hurts my incision. I walk like a grandma. I can't drive. I can't climb stairs. I can't lean forward without help. I get exhausted from showering. I can't bend over, cook or clean. It's just not what I expected. 😞😕

The only thing good about any of that day was my baby girl. 

She's truly a blessing from our God. 😇 

Paisley Marie Feagley. 

Due Oct. 12, 2015. 

Born Oct. 19, 2015. 

@ 5:39pm via C section. 

7lbs 7oz.

19.5 inches. 💕

Sorry for the long story. Just wanted to get it out.