Boyfriend just venting

This post is just about lying to yourself.

My ex boyfriend he took me to a Sushi restaurant. He seemed very interested in the oriental waitress in a sexual way. He was interested in me it was our third date. I'm Spanish. Later I discovered he left to Florida spring break with a group of college girls females, they used him and ditched him. Later he went to a party with a ex girlfriend her birthday she has a man. He wrote to different female from his past. He had a pornographic addiction asked me to watch porn with him, disastrous. Never happened again. We broke up, I noticed he liked talking to older women and he had a Asian porn fetish and food loves Sushi. All in all I could not be who he wanted, I was safe beautiful and innocent but just he doesn't know what he wants, I found out I was pregnant I started finding transgender pornography. I never felt appreciated he would always turn off the lights or use the shower for sex. I was confused, I'm young, I'm fit healthy I buy lingerie so it all humiliated me lights off the disgusting porn. We broke up, he couldn't change and I lost myself trying to be someone I'm not, I hate sushi and Asian food, I don't think they are attractive(hey everyone has a type don't think I'm racist just my personal opinion). So what I'm saying is as a man if you like black women or Asian women or white or Hispanic women etc. If you have a type don't date outside of that just you will hurt someone else. And ladies don't date a jerk I thought he liked me for who I was just he couldn't do better than me. He always made me feel less than especially with breast size or ethnicity and just I felt like I was competing trying to be perfect no one should do that. Especially gay men if you are gay don't lie to a woman get married have a family just be honest with yourself. I had to tell my story because what he did was wrong I got into the relationship at seventeen I'm 23 and pregnant with his child. I wanted to believe he loved me but nothing was good enough he's a child and that's why I'm leaving for good. But the psychological damage, and he should of thought ahead how would he want his daughter treated imagine his own mom dating a guy who prefers black women but he's with a white person, it doesn't work. I wish more women were treated with respect. I was trusting and yes skipped the warning signs. But it was his decision to tell me the truth. That's what is wrong with women oh you were stupid.. stupid for what? Dating someone trusting someone and setting rules to be honest. I always said don't cheat the front door is open break up and leave. I always said talk about your problems and sex is so important if you are incompatible sexually you should break up for a long term relationship I'd it's boring in under a year then break up, if you have addictions pornography, gambling, drinking, drugs or anything get help before entering into a relationship. Sex between a man and a women children are likely if you can't grow up and be a father or if the relationship is garbage use protection and talk about contraception be an adult. I'm frustrated because I helped him and he always talked about kids and I'm dealing with all this garbage all the lies all the irresponsible behavior. 24 years old and still a child. I don't understand how men ruin the lives of others. And don't blame me because its the man's choice to make due with his promises ladies you ever heard of Integrity and character verbal contracts that's what it is. No man has to get into a relationship with so many easy people just say hey I only want sex that's what some people want others are looking for marriage family and honesty don't play games don't hurt people's feelings its not a woman fault for believing its the man's fault for the failures the cheating, the leaving, the abuse and everything. Until death due us part, in sickness and health, remember that ladies it's the man's fault for single mothers for domestic victims rape victims all this shit because these people think its okay and the worst part is because there dad's left them all these scumbag guy's do the same instead of breaking the cycle oh my dad left me she will do just fine grow men mommy's boys becoming street thugs and doing wrong women in poverty because of the men decided to leave that's what is wrong is men and role models