Starting to feel stressed out

Barb
Between bills holidays and birthdays and trying to plan a baby shower in January I'm at that point where I'm about to give up and not do a baby shower at all but I honestly could use the help of a baby shower to help us be prepared for our lil boy.
My husband is the only one who works and I can't find a job that can give me the schedule I would need in order to be there for my two older kids and their school schedules, and being pregnant it makes it even more difficult to find a job.
I've been filling out job applications for at home Job opportunities because that would workout so perfectly for me. 
I was so close to making a go find me account today to try and see if I can get some help with the holidays birthdays n the baby but my husband wouldn't like that, he doesn't like anyone to know our business especially people close to us because they can be judgy n give negativity instead of positivity sometimes. 
I can't act like if we won't be good with 3 kids and only him working but being that the timing that this baby is planning on coming (around the holidays n bdays) and is not having a lot of space in our apartment to throw a baby shower here it's so difficult because I don't want to have to choose between giving my two older kids and my husband a good Christmas n having a baby shower which can help ugh 
Anyway thank you for letting me vent because I really have no one I can vent to, man if there was a way to receive help in my pay pal account without my hubby knowing I totally would do it so he wouldn't feel a certain type of way, don't get me wrong I'm not a person to beg or ask for help from anyone because we aren't in dire need but extra funds it would totally help right about now lol
Please no negative comments, I and my baby don't need to be stressed out because of others negativity thank u 

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