Heartbroken

Every month I get excited, I think that this month is the month I get my sweet gift from God, and yet every month is the month I become devastated. All I want is 2 lines. I've been TTC for 2 years now. Really TTC for 1. At this point I'm just about to give up. Everyone around me is getting pregnant, and I'm trying not to get jealous because most don't try, but yet they have everything I've ever wanted. I just don't understand