post partum with an ED

You don't know how lucky you are if you didn't get stretch marks. I don't even change in front of my husband because I'm so grossed out by my fat body I don't want him to see it 😭😭😭sighh. I love my liddo one with all my heart but I hate feeling like this. I've struggled with body image my whole life... The healthiest I've ever been is right before I got pregnant because I was working out instead of starving myself....I'd gone through recovery... I just hope this doesn't send me down a bad path again I need to be strong my baby girl needs a better role model than that. I was happy during my pregnancy because my baby was growing inside my tummy but now all I see is a deflated nasty beach ball.  I literally have no one to talk to about this. I don't talk to my mom about it because I don't want to scare her or have her try to force me to get help. Anybody else have an ED?