Brain Tumor

I'll be 38 weeks tomorrow and my mom lives out of state. She was diagnosed with a brain tumor and lymphoma last month. She has surgery on Monday then we'll be in ICU for several days. I was hoping to have the baby before her surgery in case it doesn't go well. The last part of this pregnancy has been so hard bc I can't travel to be with her. My dad died of a heart attack a couple years ago so she is all I have left of my parents. I'm feeling so overwhelmed with everything, I feel horrible that I'm not more excited about the birth.