SO HEARTBROKEN 💔

So I was a week late for my cycle I took a pregnancy test and it was positive so I was being hopeful after all the miscarriages I have 5 if I must count so this morning I started to spot so I went to the hospital today n it's a shame that the people there knows me when they see me come 😢😞 n why I'm there! so they say u know the procedure n which I do so they do they test n blood work n ultrasound so the dictionary came back n she said ur count is 45 n that's to early we didn't see anything on ultrasound n it could be it's early so we can't say pregnancy or not! so I am left empty hurting sad n confused I'm so broken I can't look at anyone idk why I feel ashamed are something I'm so tired of being hurt I just don't understand why I have to go through this😢💔