No longer in love
Our entire relationship has moved way too fast. We started talking in October 2014 while he was stationed overseas and then when he was stationed in my hometown we decided to meet and start dating. This was in April of 2015, by June we were engaged and living together in the house he bought. Fast forward to October 2015 and we are married. Fast forward again to now and I'm almost 11 weeks pregnant with his first child and my second. I have a 6 yr old from a previous relationship. Which only complicates things even more because she adores him.
A little before I was pregnant I started to catch my breath from how fast everything moved and even considered telling him I wanted to wait to have kids, but before I could I found out I was pregnant.
So now here I am pregnant and not even in love with the man I married. I can't even stand to be in the same room as him. I hate it when he touches, or tries to kiss me, even the way he breathes and eats. I keep telling myself it's the hormones, but in my heart i know it's because we moved too fast and the feelings are no longer there.
I feel like an awful person though, because he does so much and tries to be so helpful, but even that's irritating.
I don't know what to do, I've tried to talk to him but he just gets mopey (which pisses me off more) and won't talk or say anything.
I can't see a counselor locally because my mom is a local counselor so no one in town can see me without it being a conflict of interest. I have not admitted these feelings to anyone. For me to seek counseling outside of the town that I live in it would be a three hour round trip drive.
I have a great job and can support myself and both kids on my own if it comes to that but I don't know what to do.
Has anyone else been in a similar situation or experienced the same feelings?
I really need to figure something out though because he is active duty and the possibility of pcsing comes up in April 2017.
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