Should I tell my husband?

Question

My husband has a son from his previous marriage. He's 16 and we get along pretty well since he's living with us and I honestly love him like my own child. I've known him for about 8 years now and today he came home telling me he has fought with a teacher and its pretty serious because he might fail the class.
His dad is working a lot and had a little operation a while ago and I dont want him to stress about his sons school. He's a smart kid and I'm sure he can do it and I'll talk to his teachers again but he asked me to keep it like as a secret from his dad. 
Should I tell him or not? I'm not sure to be honest.
His mother and I get along really good aswell. She was actually the one who introduced us (my hubby-her ex) and me and we're close friends but she works a lot aboard and is totally fine (has always been) with me being the 'mother role' in her sons life. I just dont know if I'm supposed to tell him as a wife or stand by our sons side as a good mother.

Answer

I think u should sit and try to convince your son to fess upto his dad bear it in mind he is a teenager he doesn't know he is putting u in a difficult position he just came to his mom with a problem i think and its just my opinion tht if u go behind his back n tell ur husband his secret it might break hus confidence in you and he may not confide in you again!! I just think tht you should support your kid 100% and try to work on the problem!! And if you must tell your husband behind your kid's back tell him tht he asked you to keep it a secret from him?

Answer

Honestly, I wouldn't tell your husband. I would tell your son that he should tell him. If you're the one to tell, your son won't trust you again. At least that's how I feel. When I was younger my mom used to tell my aunt everything I told her and so I stopped telling her anything about my life. I think your husband will understand why you didn't tell him when he finds out. But I think it's more important with your son being at such a difficult age to keep and open line of communication with him and be someone he can confide in.

Answer

I think that you should talk to your son about having him tell his dad and that you'll stand by him when doing so. I don't think you should tell your husband because that's going against your sons trust and he'll probably be very upset with you.

Answer

Tell your husband.

Answer

You should tell your husband. The son will be upset, but the relationship between a husband and wife should matter more then the relationship between mom and son. I'm sorry 😕 I know that's probably hard to swallow. I hope it goes well.

Answer

I would talk to your son first and explain why you feel like you need to tell his father. This way you're not ambushing him and he doesn't feel ganged up on. If he's going to be receiving some kind of consequence he will feel better if he still thinks you're in his side, rather than you just went behind his back and "tattled". Trust is a very important thing in any relationship, so talk to him first!

Answer

Personally , I'd keep it a secret for a bit. But , You seem uncomfortable with that. Maybe just casually mention that his son isn't doing well in a certain class and that you're helping him the best you can.

Answer

Hmmm its a tricky one but secrets are never a good thing generally and it should be dealt with as a family x

Answer

A good mother would involve the father, when you don't, you're just being a friend.

Should I tell my husband?

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