Sad all the time😔

I'm always depressed in sad like I been threw so much in I contiune to keep this weight on my back in shoulders I got a 1 year old daughter about to Be two this month and last year in April I had another daughter but she passed away at 3 weeks and now I'm pregnant again I stress so much I think about how am I going to make it threw the year just  trying to provide for my daughter in unborn and man but can't do it all on my own love makes u do a lot of crazy things I lost my self and I'm just hurting my self keeping my baby a secret from everybody Beckz judgement and my Bd wants me to hurts my heart why me lord I just sometimes want to just give up on life but think about my babies hate my self I fill so ugly inside in out how can a person make u fill like your worth nothing fill so dead like in not alive at all