Feeling depressed

Ever wish you could just disappear? Being pregnant and depressed. I don't know how I made it this far. I want my baby to be born but then I wish he would stay in my belly just so he doesn't have to live in a world with a father like his. A man who lied to me. And verbally abused me throughout my whole pregnancy. A man who made me feel so insurance throughout my whole pregnancy. A man who told me it is my own fault that I have these insurcurities. A man who said he isn't going to set up any set schduled to see his son. A man who lies to people about his son. He is the source of my pain right now and I know what you're going to say. Focus on my baby blah blah blah. I do and I am. This is why my son has been healthy and my health has been ideal this whole pregnancy. But what you guys in here don't realize is that I am HUMAN and I have feelings that were hurt and betrayed. It has only been 6 months since the break up and around the same time of the break up I found out I was pregnant. I wasn't able to deal with a break up and shocking news of a pregnancy. Usually it's one or the other and it usually isn't dealt with at the same time. I just want to disappear and I want no one to find me.