Happiness

Lately I haven't been feeling myself, I've been down and very confused. I have to decide my future, the thing that is getting to me is that the future I've wanted since I was little and have dreamed about I can't have. My partner isn't ready for a baby but he told me he was at one stage. He even was telling me why it is good to have a baby and how much he will love having a little family but when it got to the time, he didn't want it anymore. My goal might seem very stupid and pointless to some women who might think of me as a woman with no back bone only to follow what women have been told to do for centuries but this is what I want and I can't change that. I've tried, to think of other opportunities but all I can think about is being a stay at home mum. I'm ready now and I can't wait any longer. I need some advice should I try again and looke for other things or?