Frustrated and losing hope😢😔

Jessica
I am late on my period and been having sooo many symptoms but every time I take a test I have to squint to be able to see the line and then I can only see it when I turn certain ways in the light and then question is in seeing things cause I would do anything to see atleast a faint line that I don't have to squint to see.. I want to be a mother more then anything.. I had a miscarriage at 9 weeks, a few months ago.. I was heartbroken from it and me an my husband have been trying ever since I feel like my body is playing tricks on me and makes me think I am pregnant but I'm not.. I'm kind of losing hope.i don't feel the need to try anymore really I mean it's ridiculous.. And so jealous of the moms who have beautiful babies and belly shots.. I'm just so upset ..has anyone gone through something similar.?