I don't feel safe around him

So I am engaged to a wonderful and loving man, we are in a long distance relationship, so usually to make it work we meet up about every two months and spend a week and a half - 2 weeks at a hotel together, we do fun stuff and plan outings every day, it's really awesome for long distance couples:) but anyways, the last time I met up with him I got really drunk, we both did actually, but I'm such a lightweight lol I'm a horrible drunk:( we drove back to the hotel and I wabbled to the shower, then to the bed to sleep it off. I woke up the next morning and I didn't remember anything. He told me we came home and had sex, I wasn't surprised, I trust him fully and if I don't remember anything it's because I was drunk, we would have had sex anyway lol. But about two months later he admitted something to me.