Class of 2016..😞

This year was my year to Graduate.. Yesterday i saw ally high school friends graduate. And i couldnt help but feel this anger inside of me. When i was younger i slacked in school always talked back to teachers skipped school to smoke pot everyone always tried to get me to take a different path but i chose the wrong one.. In 8th grade i got expelled on the day before the last day of school. Can you believe that a day before the end of the year for getting in a fight with a girl. That was my first charge. I ran away from home to go hangout with my friends didnt show up to court because i didnt even know i had court. I got arrested for possesion of marijuana and being on the run. I went to Juvenille detention same day i got put into a program for youths lived there for 2 months got kicked out twice second time they wouldnt take me back. I spent a weeks in DEL (juvenille) finally came home i was put on probation but i went back to my old ways. I started moving on to different drugs. I remember halloween of 2014 i did my first hit of meth. I went to a party got drunk and high. I had a friend of mine pretend he was my P.O and call my mom saying i was with him doing a recreational activity but that eventually caught up with me. I went back to DEL for 6 months then an all girls program far away for 8 months. I graduated that program i was home again all was well. I started going to high school a new school my sophmore year i went for 3 months then dropped out ran away with a boy started doing meth then i was hooked the second time in my life hitting the pipe and i thought whats the worst that could happened right? But no i did it every day i became a person i didnt even recognize anymore i hadnt seen my family in weeks i was living with my boyfriend i thought i loved. I would've done anything for the drugs and for him. Then i was walking to a church to have my friend pick me who went all the way to gresham to pick up some meth and he came back but my dad was passing by and had seen me so i ran i hid and my friend eventually picked me up. But my cuzin came along to give me some clothes and she was walking home my dad stopped her and she told him where i was the police came i jumped out the back window ran the cops started chasing after me i ran into a random mans home i remember him yelling at me to get out but i was 15 and confused that day i almost overdosed the ambulance took me into the hospital and i was shaking and laughing all i wanted was to smoke so it could go away. I went to DEL again for 8 months went to another program for a year. I sobered up built a relationship with My family met an amazing guy. Im young and pregnant with a miracle i have been 2 years and a half sober and off probation. I did not get to Graduate with my class and i regret the decisions i made and i wish i would've done things differently. But im getting my GED and i know my day will come where i get to make my family and myself proud. And god gave me such a beautiful blessing on top of it all and she is what keeps me going. Sorry for the long post i was just feeling a little envious and grateful at the same time needed to rant