VENTING! Startn to lose hope! Plz

Shew Im so tired of seein - tests, its been 8 monthes now and Im gettin ready to start my AF n a day, this month I used opk'S but i think i need to take them more often b/c I'll catch my lines gettin pretty dark but not as dark or darker than the control line. Anyone else have this problem? I guess if AF shows her face I'll try preseed, opk'S and put my mooncup n after sex. We just rele want a baby and I dont wanna lose faith, but the - tests every month r startin to get to me U kno.? This would b my 2nd and my S/O's 1st baby. He would b thrilled, hes wanted a baby for awhile! Thanx for listenin to me vent sorry I took up your time! Baby dust to all! 💕💜☠🍼😩😒🍀