Can't stop thinking about mmc in Feb 😢

Sadie • I`ve been blessed with one gorgeous boy and after a mmc in Feb we`re trying again to give him a brother or sister
Having such a bad day today, all week I've been waiting for af due on sat arguing with myself about not getting my hopes up but then I think what if I am pregnant?
Feeling so stressed out about it which I know doesn't help matters but what can I do??
 My friends tell me it'll happen one day and to stop thinking about it but how the hell do I do that?!
What makes it worse is that I couldn't sleep last night as my mind kept replaying the moment I found out I lost my baby at 11 weeks in Feb, and then having to go back to the hospital for a d&c. Now I'm scared not only of af arriving but also if I do get a BFP I might lose it again. 
Tearing myself apart here 😢