I don't know why knowing the gender matters so much to me. It's either a boy or a girl... But I didn't get to see it at the anatomy scan and since the 16th I've been looking for places that will do elective ultrasounds. I found one yesterday, and the only day they had was today and then was booked until July! My husband worked today and we didn't have the money yet. So, I went into the room and cried my eyes out. I feel like I have had no control over this whole freaking thing. Didn't expect to get pregnant, got pregnant. Wanted to know the gender, kid sat on my cervix and wouldn't move. Can't find somewhere to give me an ultrasound... I'm frustrated and really confused as to why this matters so much to me. Anyways, sorry for another rant. My mom doesn't understand, and says "you would have hated it 40 years ago when you had to wait til birth" and my husband gets mouthy with me when I bring it up. I just can't help the emotions right now.